Auf dem Zaun

Guess who is done with finals, omfg.

Tomorrow I am going to celebrate by doing laundry. Which doesn't seem exciting, but I am down to the Clothes I Never Wear. Which is also a good indication of what needs to go in the donate pile.

ALSO I AM GOING TO DRAW. My god, am I going to draw. Later when I am a little less DONESQUEE, I will post some shots of my projects. I am pretty damn happy with them.

Title: That We Share
Author: leda_speaks
Fandom: Supernatural
Characters/Pairing: Ruby/Meg/Casey
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 198
Warnings: mild BDSM
Challenge/Prompt: #41 - burn
Summary: It's a small world.

That We Share

You've probably read by now that LJ tried to push some code recently that would have made picking a "gender" field -- male or female -- mandatory for signing up, and which would have removed the "unspecified" field altogether. You've probably read it on your flist or dwircle*, because it's been all over mine. And I'd like to say, no matter how shitty I think LJ's move has been, to see post after post of people protesting and signal-boosting and taking action did give me warm fuzzies.

However, after LJ back-pedalled they were trying to sell it as a "mistake" that "did not have any chance to go live". Which is bullshit, as branchandroot explains.

You can read an overview of both the change and the official reply in synecdochic's journal.

One last thing: yes, they took it back, but at some point they thought it was a good idea, or else they wouldn't have tried. And it's not exactly reassuring that they didn't even announce this, but decided to sneak it in quietly and remove it only after users protest.

ETA: okay, one other last thing: this code change would have sucked, obviously, for all people on the trans or genderqueer/agender spectrum. But it's also about girls and women who prefer not telling their gender on the internet to avoid harassment or stalking.



* I've seen someone else use that word (a portmanteau of Dreamwidth and their 'friendslist' term, Circle) in their journal, and it's equally cute and odd, so I heart it.


ETA: off to bed. Will read comments tomorrow, reply when I have the time. Plz be excellent to each other. Thnx.

Just got back from work. My journal didn't explode, which is cool! I also had maybe one hour of sleep and I wonder if I only feel good because my body currently produces its own drugs. Hah.

For the record, it's okay to link to the previous post, bookmark it, or pet it and call it George. The ETA's mainly there because, well, I didn't know what would happen during my absence. And if it should spare anyone the hassle of having to explain things all over again to Clueless Person Of The Day, that alone would be worth it.

I'm still digesting the responses and thoughts of others. And your comments mean a lot to me. Of course, it's gonna take days for me to answer them, but... still. You're awesome.

There's so much else I want to write about. My energy levels fluctuate wildly, but my brain never shuts up, I just cannot keep up and it frustrates me.

Damn, I haven't even eaten yet. *shoves fast-food baguettes into the oven*

Stuff I've been up to

TV programs

+ Glee (the pilot was the best episode)
+ Misfits (OMG this show is so great! Thanks, omarandjohnny!)
+ soap story lines: Christian & Syed of Eastenders, Adam & Aaron of Emmerdale

workworkwork

+ at this year's Christmas market (we sell children's toys made out of wood)
+ I work almost 20 hours a week (the market is open from 10am to 9pm) and it's really starting to get cold
+ I have 4 very nice colleagues
+ work is mostly fun but it can get boring pretty fast when there aren't many people walking around

(Entry Mirror List: InsaneJournal / Dreamwidth)

This is, in the short run, a reaction to the goings-on in a recent Fandom Wank post. I'm not linking to it because a) you probably will see (or already have seen) lots of links around your Flist/Circle, and b) in the long run, it is also about attitudes I see popping up over and over and over again. Attitudes I'm fucking sick and tired of, so I decided to adress them, hopefully so that I can just link to this post in the future instead of breathing fire for several paragraphs in someone else's community/journal.

Post-it version: When a person asks you to use a certain pronoun for them, you use it. When they say they are trans, you act accordingly and don't question their identity. The self-identity of the trans person overrides everything else. If you don't respect that, you propagate transphobia.

Okay, now the tl;dr version.

( Cut for length. )



ETA: I'm now off to bed because I have, like, three hours of sleep left before going to work. And then I'll be at work instead of watching my comment inbox. (Back.) I can't say where this entry gets linked, so IF any strangers should show up to spill -phobic shit, they could get away with it for a while (if the other commenters let them). But believe me, I'd have no qualms swinging the banhammer once I'm back home.

ETA2: despite my caveats above - yes, you can link to this entry, quote from it, and pet it and call it George.

Last night I picked up pasta for dinner from the cafe around the corner, and instead of working on our finals, J and I watched 5 episodes of White Collar.

In our defense, we were both too exhausted from work to do anything productive.

Also in our defense, we are addicted.

We will be saving the last ep for /after/ finals. I... I'm probably going to need icons. :x

Doodled today because my renders in mental ray were choking my computer and taking forever.

( Sketchy kiss thing. )

I'm ridiculously behind on my lighting final. I'd been struggling with a specific hurdle, and I got past that this last weekend, but since I was working so hard on figuring out wtf my problem was in only that one area, I'm now behind on all the other parts. Oops. I console myself with the fact that it's not part of my major, I just wanted to know how to do it and now I do, so I'm good so long as I pass.

My modeling finals, while running into a few issues that are mostly hardware related are going fairly peachy. I'm not going to get them as polished as I'd like, but considering that I was spreading my time between four classes and work, I'm pretty damn happy with what I've come up with.

Wednesday... zomg. Wednesday and I'll be done for six weeks with mostly online classes in the upcoming semester. I might be working full time, but omg that I can handle. This semester has been one long steady crush of too much to freaking do. I'm mostly caught up on all my CSI TV at least (we shall not speak of SPN). J and I are one episode of Fringe behind, but we might be able to sit down for that tonight.

And now I have sipped at my tea and my fingers are warm and I should get back to rendering. Cue flaily arms.

[Babylon 5] spacelogic: meta: squicks and siblings: "Claudia Christian mentioned in a blog post the other day that a B5 director (...) had told her to play her scenes with Sheridan more "sexy and coquettish" and I had such a strong "EWNOGROSS" reaction that I had to step back and analyze why."

[Stargate/SGA] rood: On Stargate And Why It Will Never Be Among My Favourite Series: "And not only are the languages pure decoration and occasional plot device: the cultures are, too."

As part of her reply to a five-questions meme, the_rck responds to Does it feel weird being a 'mom' in fandom?

IJ-related:

Permanently Insane accounts are on sale throughout December, until January 3rd.

squeaky explained that the issues with email notifications are apparently caused by spammers using the site. Some sub threads deal with different email providers and how to circumvent their blocking of IJ messages. It also says that, if your account is being suspended by mistake, you should open a support request in the Abuse category.

Spammer account comments on the post that's discussing the problems with IJ's email notifications being caused by spammers: http://asylums.insanejournal.com/announcements/73390.html?thread=3743406&format=light#t3743406

ETA: and yeah, the notification issue sucks, but I have to chuckle at the dramatic tone when some RPer (in response to an earlier post) accuses Squeaky, in CAPSLOCK, "YOU ARE KILLING MY GAME". Is that supposed to make him feel soul-wrecking guilt, or what?

I remembered that I wrote this months ago because today is Stargate Wednesday on RTL2. I think I mentioned it somewhere already, so I’m posting this before I forget about it again.


So I’ve been watching a lot of Stargate lately, both SG-1 and Atlantis. Which isn’t quite that unusual since I used to watch it every Wednesday until Pro7 decided to air the xth season of Buffy in the same time slot, and given the choice between Stargate and Buffy, my father lost and my brother and I won. That was before I changed schools for the last time, I think, so it’s been eight or nine years. And I’ve changed since then. As has Stargate. Characters died and left and … well, I don’t want to spoil anyone, but a lot has changed.

I also realise that what I’m about to say has probably been said a zillion times before, but a lot has been bugging me about the Stargate franchise from the start, back when I still lacked the words and the knowledge to express my thoughts. I also find it easier to accept some problematic content (like the premise that pyramids were built for spaceships and its implications) while some insignificant details annoy me to no end. I can suspend my disbelief only selectively, apparently. I also realise that sometimes, the shows did it right. I’m talking more about my general impressions.

( On Stargate And Why It Will Never Be Among My Favourite Series )

☞ My Yuletide beta (I had to write to a second person, who actually answered) promised me she would be done by Monday or Tuesday, so I am now glancing anxiously at the mail symbol of my browser every few minutes while I wait for the weekly party downstairs to quiet down a bit. I'm really nervous because I still have to look for a Britpicker and won't be in LE for a few days. My mother and I are visiting the relative of a relative of a relative in Göttingen for a few days and I don't think my mother will book a hotel with internet access.

☞ In other news: Chuck ate my brain. I only watched it because I was a bit bored, it stared Adam Baldwin and because I caught an episode on TV a while ago. I love it. Chuck is adorable and Casey is like Jayne only more clever; I like Sarah and Ellie and Morgan and Captain Awesome. Also: Awesome likes to run around half naked. Overall, the show is sweet and funny, even though it hits my embarrassment squick sometimes.

☞ I actually found a decent story on ff.de. Weird things do happen. Half of the stories that I have to look at as an OP are Mary Sue stories or stories with canon characters as Sues, though. No idea why people over there think the fandoms are overrun by slash. Do het fans have a persecution complex? Is everything about 15% slash more than acceptable?

Events taken from the last couple of days. I thought it might be... interesting... to list the small, everyday stuff. You know, the thing that many cis people say we make too much of a fuss about.

( Mentions instances of cissexism, misgendering, and passing/not-passing. )

* special edit: this is NOT an implicit inquiry for advice on binding. I did my own research and have sorted things out for the near future.

Challenge #40: Serious is officially closed.

The new challenge will be--

CHALLENGE #41: BURN

And as always feel free to write a drabble based on any of the past challenges.

There Are Legends by ras_elased. Merlin/Arthur-Reinkarnationsstory einmal anders herum und das auch noch als Vid! Eine unglaublich toll erzählte Geschichte, die man schauen sollte, wie man sonst Fanfiction liest. Das ist eine geniale konstruierte Realität (der Roadtrip macht's möglich!), die sich wie ein zweiter Canon anfühlt, und bei der einfach alles zusammen passt, inklusive Angst und Happy End. ♥
Instead of Arthur being taken to Avalon and Merlin being immortal and waiting for Arthur to be reincarnated, Merlin trades in his immortality to save Arthur's life, so now Arthur is immortal and waits for Merlin to return from Avalon. Centuries go by, and he mostly lives in the past, unable to let go, until one day he passes Merlin on the street...

(Cross-posted to dingsis_notebook)

Snippet taken from an IJ entry written in November 2008, but never posted.

---

I have the tendency to pile up HUGE stashes of various documents and papers (and photographs and magazines and bills and the stray book and and and). I used to try and sort them all at once during a day reserved for this activity, but only ended up with three smaller piles and the feeling that the task was too daunting. And it was. I made it so.

A few weeks ago, I did a complete relabeling of my binders, structuring them by subject (e.g. work, healthcare) and chronologically. Not using all of them right away, but moving some of the already filed papers if necessary, and creating a system for further use. And I put them in a place where I could easily see and grab them in a moment's notice. Same for the hole puncher, which I placed visibly on the table. And instead of sitting in front of huge piles of documents and feeling intimidated, I started filing them away little by little. One or three or ten a day, or ten a week. Instead of "take a whole day and sort this shit even if it kills you", I now think "if you see a piece of paper lying around, and can assess in which binder it belongs, take a few seconds to file it away".

And it helps. It helps because it's just a few seconds and the task itself isn't daunting anymore. Of course there's still this massive backlog I have to work on, but I know I will have it sorted out in the long run. Which makes me feel better. I also noticed that now I am far more likely to put away new papers immediately.

A few of you might wonder what the big deal is. Understandably so, because I think strategies like these are simply common sense for most people. But not for me. I've always been a very chaotic person, I'm still terrible at household chores, cleaning, dusting off, stuff like that. My room generally looks like a mess most of the time and I get easily distracted (while feeling guilty about not being able to do things better). So, for me, changing my tactics and trying to get things done in a way that relieved my stress, and allowing myself to think that this was okay, is a big step.

(Besides, even though I have no doubt that countless individuals have blogged about this, I had the idea all on my own and without someone from outside telling me to do something about the effing stacks of paper. So I'm a little proud of myself.)

---

Update:

I still use the technique described above, and there are noticeable results: several bags of waste paper thrown away, finding documents I thought to have been lost, and displacing things less often in general. Over the recent months, I started applying it to the kitchen as well, cleaning and re-organizing it little by little. It's starting to show - cooking is more fun now, and even my Mom made a remark today how much better everything looked.

I still struggle with guilt sometimes that things are taking me so long, or that I needed years to acquire basic housekeeping skills that others pick up early or with ease. It makes me feel small, lazy, stupid. I feel like I shouldn't even mention it, as if it was the equivalent of boasting that you can use the potty.

I consciously remind myself:

1. People have different levels of tolerance; some are very orderly and clean their house weekly to feel comfortable while others when faced with the same amount of dirt or clutter wouldn't mind.
2. My depression and anxiety have caused problems before when it comes to my energy level in general, and I had to re-learn caring for myself at all. I'm reluctant to even mention it because so often it's being dismissed as a lazy excuse, but I want to keep in mind that it IS a factor in my life that makes some things harder than they ought to be.
3. For fuck's sake, self: I'M MAKING PROGRESS. Yes, it's a slow process, but it beats doing nothing. Obviously.

I found this information thanks to zarhooie (source), and thought I'd pass it on / write it down so I won't forget.

You need to go to the admin console - usually located at the URL of the journal main site with /admin/console/ added at the end, e.g. http://www.insanejournal.com/admin/console/ or http://www.dreamwidth.org/admin/console/ .

Then type the following:

community name-of-community remove your-username

Example: community i_wanna_leave remove das_dingsi

Hit "execute", and you're done!